Photo by Руслан Гамзалиев on Unsplash
How to Sail Through Limbo
Worst. Limbo is the worst. Not the dance, that’s ok. Some would say fun. I would have for sure in my more flexible days.
But I’m talking about the other kind of limbo — ˈ/limbō/an uncertain period of awaiting a decision or resolution; an intermediate state or condition.
Sometimes self-imposed but other times beyond our control. In my 30s I lived for about a year in a self-imposed state of limbo waiting around for a guy that “Didn’t know if he was ready to be in a relationship.” Uhhhhh hahaha CLEARLY the answer was no and I’m still using alll the lessons I learned from this debacle. Meh. Another story from another time.
Recently I’ve been in another kind of limbo. The annoying in between time when you’re in your new home but things just aren’t settled. Until yesterday I hadn’t found a dresser I wanted and my clothes were overflowing out of suitcases and strewn randomly across a couple of rooms.
This morning I went to bake a bundt cake for breakfast (VERY Italian — they love dessert for breakfast) and realized I didn’t have any measuring cups and had no clue where my hand mixer was. Wahhh wahhhh! I persevered and made the bundt happen but it wasn’t all that fab with the ratio of baking powder to flour a full on guess. Whatever. I’m ok with it.
While things have been loosey goosey and limbo-like around the house I’ve really found peace of mind in my rituals. Both morning and night. Wake up, get some coffee (ignore the boxes and step over the suitcases), and meditate. It’s saved me. Chaotic inside. Calming inside. Breathe and continue to ignore the boxes.
At night, just making myself some tea and lighting a candle before bed does the trick. Also taking my glasses off so I can’t see the mess helped a lot too. Ha! Totally nearsighted, it has it’s advantages!
Here’s the take home. It’s a skill to be honed, this ability to calm yourself inside while things may be chaotic around you. A stressful work situation, something going on in your relationships — whether it’s with your Mom or your partner. Go inside you. Take some moments, shut everything out, and give yourself a moment’s PEACE for goodness sake!
I’m not the end all be all when it comes to this. But I sure have gotten better at it over the years and it’s saved my bacon plenty of times. Currently I’m using a meditation app called Headspace. I’ve also heard that Calm is good. App or no, there’s plenty of free guided meditations on YouTube or music you can pop in your ears for background music.
Try it out. It may surprise you. YOU may surprise you.