Three Things, my Wednesday post series, inspired by my love for bite-sized, tiny but mighty pieces of information.

One. This. —

I got fed up. Not of anything of note. Just one of those little daily annoyances: the constant typing of  “no ducking way,” on my phone. So I fixed it forever and ever amen, and then some. I created a shortcut. Several, actually. Duck converts now and so does Ducking. No more, “you’re shotting me,” either.

Emoji short cuts, long phrases, they’re all in my phone now with an efficient precision making me feel like an accomplished human of the best kind. I’m giddy with the efficiency of it all. Here’s how you too can banish ducking from your life, too.

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Two. “Scary Stuff” —

About seven years ago I scared myself straight. I love to be scared. For a moment. And then I want to erase what made me scared so I can go to the bathroom in the middle of the night without having a heart attack. You know, the little stuff.

About this time seven years ago, I had been watching some ghost show and had been jumpy for about a week. Then one morning my bedroom fan which was always, always, stationary and pointed at the foot of my bed, began to oscillate back and forth. I woke to the soft breeze hitting my face at regular intervals. Since the only way to change this feature of the fan is to push down with the power of Zeus on this manual knob thingy, I can only conclude that this was indeed a ghost. No more shows. Case closed.

And then last week someone sent me this link to a guy on twitter that is recording what he believes to be a ghost in his apartment and I want to watch (I so do) but I can’t. So you guys watch and report back. Please.

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Three. Am I the Only One? —

Yesterday I pulled on my wine colored short booties with a newly procured big cozy wrap from Banana Republic (I’m the worst, I can’t find the link) and I loved every second of it. Because it was finally below 1 million degrees with less than 119% humidity. I’m not exaggerating, not really. I smiled all day about this. Especially when I rolled into a coffee shop and I got a “Wow, now that’s some color coordination,” comment. Tuesday Win.

I will be 41 next month and I had my braces taken off when I was 13. Today I have an orthodontist appointment. Will there ever be a time when our permanent retainers won’t need to be fixed? Probably not.

I was up last night for two hours with indigestion. No clue why. And then while laying there, I started thinking about a specific instance in 7th grade, when I wasn’t nice to someone. Why do we do this to ourselves, the middle of the night life review? Or am I the only one? Can I get some feedback on this please?